Nature Versus Nurture

Nature Versus Nurture

“While genes are pivotal in establishing some aspects of emotionality, experience plays a central role in turning genes on and off. DNA is not the heart’s destiny; the genetic lottery may determine the cards in your deck, but experience deals with the hand you can play. Scientists have proven, for example, that good mothering can override a disadvantageous temperament.”

― Thomas Lewis

Maybe she was born with it...maybe it’s Maybelline ha Just kidding… In life, we gain so much of our character from the way we were raised and from our environment but there is also a great deal that comes to us just by being us, traits and qualities we were born with! But how do you tell them apart? And do we need to know the difference?

This week in class we talked a lot about the concept of different personalities traits, especially between boys and girls. In the home, most adults are open to the idea of exposing their children to toys that are normally associated with the opposite gender, and it’s interesting to see how that affects the child growing up.

I watched this happen in my own home. My two oldest brothers grew up together, they would spend a lot of their time playing video games together, shooting BB-guns outside, wrestling on the tramp...basically, anything physical was their idea of a good time. On the other hand, my older sister was the opposite, she would spend time inside watching Disney channel shows or playing with barbies and other toys. Then when I was born I was in the middle there’s a large age gap between me and my siblings so I would do both! I would wrestle on the tramp with my brother then go inside and play dolls with my sister. And it’s so interesting now how these little things changed the qualities we have now and what we took interest in growing up. My sister never tried out for sports and but she did love staying home with her friends, while my brothers were the same, they loved to shoot with their friends and they still get together and play video games. When I compare it to my life now I can see that I always jumped back and forth between the boy-girl stereotypes I grew up doing pageants in high school wearing huge ballgowns and at the same time was teaching self-defense at a local police station and working as a firefighter on the side...and I loved it!

There is such great value in letting your kids be themselves presenting them with the options and letting them choose who they want to be. We need balance. We need each other. Having equal gender roles doesn’t mean having the exactly same personalities or doing the same things it means respecting one another and working together in harmony using each other's strengths and helping one another’s weaknesses.